Press Room

I’m famous for my lists and records. I can’t help myself; I think I inherited the record-keeping gene from my father. Every day I make a note of the weather, the temperature, the first snowdrop, the day the ants fly, the exchange rate of the euro, everything. I make packing lists, holiday lists, ‘To Do’ lists and ‘Joe, Will You Please’ lists. I even make lists of lists. My nickname at work was Schindler.

Also, I have terrible difficulty throwing anything away. I find my heart racing and my fingers clamp possessively on the object in question. After all, a rusty hostess trolley, or broken watch, or a 1996 calendar, or whatever, may come in useful some day… So I rarely delete old emails and have diaries dating back years.

Both these dubious character traits of mine, for a pleasant change, proved really useful and helped ‘Chickens’ to hatch.

Moving to Spain was undeniably a culture shock. Every new day produced events either hilarious or heart-warming. Food suddenly tasted better, human behaviour was more fascinating, local events more interesting. It was like seeing in colour for the first time, and the book began bubbling in my head.

Of course, Joe often lost patience with me, and rightly so. ‘Stop dreaming, and concentrate! Hold that ladder steady or I’m going to break a leg in a minute!’ But the book was relentless. As soon as I could, I unearthed all my records, notes, old emails to friends, and began to write.

It’s funny where life takes you… When I was a little girl and asked what I wanted to be when I grew up, I always answered, ‘A zoo-keeper.’ No, I never realised that ambition, but life in Spain has not been that far removed. Okay, I agree, chickens, mules and all the other animals (including humans) I wrote about may not be very exotic. But their behaviour was just as riveting as that of any grizzly bear or meerkat.

As I wrote, the book made me laugh and cry. When, reluctantly, I showed it to other people, I was astonished to see them react the same way. One may easily imagine my delight when ‘Chickens’ was awarded the HarperCollins Authonomy ‘Gold Star’, and is still today the only non-fiction book to claim that distinction.

I love Spain. I love the Spanish people. I love Spanish food. I hope all this shines through in my writing, even when I’m describing some of the less savoury things that happened to us.

Victoria Twead

Interviewer: Hello Victoria, Congratulations on being awarded the HarperCollins Gold Star and your Amazon Bestseller status.

Vicky: Thanks! Still can't believe it!

Interviewer: First of all, what makes you write?

Vicky: I can't take life very seriously, and when I see people smiling, or better still, laughing out loud as they read my stuff, that absolutely floats my boat.

Interviewer: Well, I laughed all the way through, even more at the end than at the beginning! Did they really call you 'Schindler' at work because you're always writing lists?

Vicky: Yes.

Interviewer: And did you really knock over the village fountain?

Vicky: Yes.

Interviewer: What about the characters in the book? They're hilarious - are they real, too?

Vicky: Oh, yes.

Interviewer: My favourite characters are probably Judith and Mother, they had me laughing all the way. And what did your sister and her husband say when they read about themselves in the book?

Vicky: Ah, the Eco-Warriors... I have to admit, I was a bit nervous about showing them those chapters... But they were fine about it. They said in real life, they're much worse than I'd described, so that was okay...phew!

Interviewer: How difficult did you find it settling into such a small Spanish village? You didn't speak any Spanish, did you?

Vicky: Not difficult at all, everyone made us so welcome. But we had to learn to speak Spanish very quickly or life would have been much harder.

Interviewer: What was most different?

Vicky: Gosh, where do I start? Little children playing outside at 2 or 3 in the morning. Shops all closing at 2 in the afternoon. Crocuses flowering in November. The Fiestas - which are totally mad! The lovely Spanish attitude towards the elderly and families. I could go on and on...

Interviewer: I have to ask about the chickens. I can't use the words in this interview, but were those REALLY their names?

Vicky: Oh, yes!

Interviewer: I fully understand why you had to part with Cocky. Was he as bad as you described?

Vicky: He was much worse. He was the most ferocious little creature I have ever come across, except perhaps for Tasmanian Devils which have pretty bad reputations. We really missed him though.

Interviewer: Those little matchstick-men you use as scene breaks. What are they?

Vicky: Ah, the Indalo, the Rainbow Man. That's the emblem for the region, you'll see it everywhere in the Almería region; as statues on roundabouts, on car bumpers, on tourist souvenirs and in people's houses. As I explain in the book, if you buy one and give it to someone else - it's supposed to bring them luck. But if you buy one for yourself, that's VERY bad luck. I'm not superstitious, or I wasn't until I came across the Rainbow Man. You read in the book what happened to us when I bought one for myself! I won't be doing that again in a hurry!

Interviewer: Yes, I remember! I'll take your advice on that one!

Now, the recipes... I loved the way you slipped those into the book. Where did they come from?

Vicky: A variety of places. A lot came from Gayle and Iain at Orce Serrano Hams. They are superb cooks and test drive each recipe before they are posted on their blog. They often photograph each step as they go along, too. Other recipes came from characters in the book, and the village ladies.

Interviewer: I tried the Crispy Potatoes - Patatas Bravas recipe. Have to say, it was delicious and I've added it to my own recipe collection.

Vicky: Good, we like that one, too. I just love the whole Spanish Tapas idea. Little bits of this and that - yum!

Interviewer: Have you been on any more Home Exchanges since the one mentioned in the book?

Vicky: No, not yet. Perhaps when my daughter in Australia gets married we'll swap houses with someone in Sydney.

Interviewer: Have you ever regretted moving to Spain?

Vicky: Never.

Interviewer: Do you have plans for any more books in the future?

Vicky: Oh, yes! The sequel is underway. Every day I gather more material, and I jot things down. I hope to get started quite soon.

Interviewer: Well, thank you, Vicky, for the chat. I thoroughly recommend 'Chickens, Mules and Two Old Fools' as a really good read. I couldn't put it down and I'm really looking forward to the next one.

Vicky: It's a pleasure. Oh, and I brought you some eggs. Laid yesterday.

Interviewer: Well, that's a first! Thank you very much!

Chickens set to soar!

We all need to read a book that makes us chuckle and forget our troubles. Victoria Twead has done exactly that with her hilarious new award-winning page-turner, ‘Chickens, Mules and Two Old Fools’. This book bursts with irreverent humour, animals, eccentric characters and Spanish sunshine.

Set in sun-scorched Andalucía, ’Chickens’ describes Vicky and Joe’s life-changing move to a tiny village tucked in the Alpujarra mountains. The couple have no idea of the culture shock awaiting them, no idea they will become reluctant chicken farmers or own the most dangerous cockerel in Spain. At the end of five years, they must decide. Will they wave good-bye to the chickens, mules, crazy characters and adventures and return to the relative sanity of England, or stay in the village of El Hoyo?

Woven into the chapters are a number of Spanish recipes given to Victoria by the village ladies. All manner of tapas, paella and barbecue ideas are offered, each one tried, tested and delicious.

This charming, beautifully written book will have you shouting with laughter one minute, holding back tears the next, and perhaps even reaching for your saucepan.

HarperCollins: ‘laugh-out-loud funny ... especially the Spanish women heckling over eggs from “The English”, hilarious, engaging ... the interspersion of recipes is charming’.

The Telegraph (UK):

‘a charming and funny expat tale’

The Catalunya Chronicle:

‘Weeks later, you will be standing at your kitchen window doing the dishes and recall some fleeting scene with chickens or mules or two old fools and laugh out loud all over again.’

Book title: Chickens, Mules and Two Old Fools

Author: Victoria Twead

Publisher: New Generation Publishing

Date of publication: October 2009

Available in Paperback and ebook

Ebook conversion by Ant Press.org

‘the book began bubbling’

Victoria Twead painting chairs

Victoria Twead

Victoria Twead nagged her long-suffering partner, Joe, into moving from England to Spain in 2004. They settled into a tiny mountain village in Andalucía, became reluctant chicken farmers and ended up owning probably the most dangerous cockerel in Spain. Victoria’s hilarious record of their culture shock and life with the villagers is told in her book, Chickens, Mules and Two Old Fools, awarded the HarperCollins Gold Star.

Chickens became an Amazon Bestseller in 2011, staying in the Top 100 for four months.

The sequel to Chickens, titled Two Old Fools - Olé!, was launched in 2011 and is the second in the Old Fool series.

‘Cocky’ - the rooster from Hell

Victoria Twead

For more information, interviews or to contact the author directly, please click here.

chickens, humour, humor, comedy, Spain, moving to Spain, expat, award winning, Spanish food, tapas, chickens, Andalucia, beach read, summer read, holiday read, mules, old fools, paella, cazuela, traditional Spanish cooking, reviews, rooster, home exchange, Victoria Twead, biography, memoir, living in Spain,

Listen to Victoria being interviewed on Talk Radio Europe by Hannah Murray.

Victoria - in brief

How ‘Chickens’ was hatched

Press Release for ‘Chickens’

Press Release for ‘Two Old Fools - Olé!’

The Two Old Fools are back!

We’ve all been waiting hungrily for the sequel to ‘Chickens, Mules and Two Old Fools’, and now it’s here; ‘Two Old Fools - Olé!’ has arrived!

Once again, set in the tiny village of El Hoyo in Andalucía, this hilarious, colourful sequel describes Vicky and Joe’s next two years, and how their lives are turned upside down by the arrival of their new neighbours, the Ufartes.

As before, life is never dull or predictable, and the Two Old Fools lurch from scrape to scrape until forced into making an unexpected, life-changing decision.

Victoria’s first book, ‘Chickens’ became an Amazon Bestseller and stayed in the Top 100 chart for four months, and this sequel is destined to do even better. Both the paperback and ebook editions have numerous photographs from Victoria’s album, and there are plenty of Spanish recipes sprinkled throughout to keep your mouth watering.

‘Two Old Fools - Olé!’ will chase away the greyest day and make you long to visit the crazy, charming village of El Hoyo, or at least book a holiday in Spain. Victoria’s writing is delightful and it may be advisable not to attempt to read this book in a public place, unless you don’t mind strangers staring open-mouthed as you roar with laughter.

Karen Wheeler, author of 'Tout Sweet: Hanging Up My Heels For A New Life In France.'

“Andalucía as it’s never been done before - a very quirky, funny and enjoyable tale - loved the subtle humour, Olé!”

Justin Aldridge, Eye on Spain:

"I absolutely loved it! Funny, honest and impossible to put down."

Book title: Two Old Fools - Olé!

Author: Victoria Twead

Publisher: FAR Publishing

Date of publication: October 2011

Available in Paperback and ebook

Ebook conversion by Ant Press.org

Interview with Victoria Twead

Book trailer for ‘Chickens’

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Also by, or featuring Victoria Twead